Legal Advice: Assorted Stupidity #108

Sentenced to compliments: Faced with a defendant who had violated a protection order by sending his ex-girlfriend 144 harassing messages, a judge in Hawaii sentenced him to write 144 compliments about her, so he will have written a “nice thing” for every “nasty thing” he said. He is not allowed to “repeat words,” according to the report, so that may be an especially difficult challenge for him. Because he may not know that many words.

He also got 157 days (time served), two years of probation, 200 hours of community service and $2,400 in fines, so it’s not like he got away with just the compliment-writing after harassing his ex. That was just an added bonus.

Nationwide is on your side, but are all its agents? A Pennsylvania couple is suing Nationwide Insurance and their local police department after the latter raided their home. Nationwide is a defendant because the plaintiffs allege that one of its agents, who was at their home to investigate a claim, took pictures of “flowering plants” he thought were marijuana and alerted the police. They, of course, responded with overwhelming force, and detained the homeowners for growing what, according to them, were actually hibiscus plants. They were eventually released without charges, so that’s probably true.

Initial coin offerings “represent the most pervasive, open and notorious violation of federal securities laws since the Code of Hammurabi,” is something that came out of the mouth of a Stanford professor recently. Was the Code of Hammurabi a violation of federal securities laws? It seems doubtful, but I’m no professor.

What’s an “initial coin offering” anyway? According to the NYT it’s “a relatively new method that entrepreneurs have used to raise money for start-ups, by selling custom-built virtual currencies.” So, yeah, the rest of the professor’s sentence seems pretty solid.

No one should drink and drive, but it’s an especially bad idea if you have three prior DUI convictions. Also if you’re planning on trying to have sex with somebody while driving on a mountain highway (in fact, one called “Mountain Highway”). Also if there’s a three-year-old in the back seat while you’re doing this. This is a very, very bad idea.

Legal Advice